When Doug and I made the decision to move to the Philippines and become missionaries, we were given some wonderful advice from a fellow missionary, Becky Emperado. Becky said that as a missionary you must be tough, flexible and optimistic, make that your mantra and you'll do okay. Since I already considered myself to be those things, I thought how difficult can this advice be to follow? Little did I know...
Remi Darlin, was born on Nov. 1st. She was a beautiful, healthy, baby girl and immediately captured our heart. We had been working with her mother, Virginia for a few months and had spent the last month trying to convince her to keep her baby and let Lilia's Place help her financially. Sadly, that was not to be Virgina's choice. On Nov. 8th we drove Virginia to the bus stop so that she could go back home to Negros with her oldest daughter, Duenessa. Virgina and I clung to each other sobbing as she said goodbye to her newborn daughter. I could feel the heartbreak of this mother and yet the only thing I was able to do was to promise her that I would love and nurture her daughter as if she were my own. As we were driving home, I knew that I was holding that mother's heart in my arms. I had just witnessed the most unselfish act a mother could ever do for her child, she had sacrificed herself. Even though I thought Lilia's Place had given Virginia an option, in her mind, she never saw the options. She was paralyzed with fear, and was doing the only thing she knew would keep all three of her children from starvation. Tough, flexible and optimistic, all three were challenged by this event in our lives. My heart was shredded from witnessing Virginia's grief and yet I had to remind myself that Remi and Virgina were both alive and well because God had given Lilia's Place the opportunity to care for them. It may not have turned out the way I had prayed and imagined, but then again, God has a plan.
Our street feeding ministry also challenges me each time we are given the opportunity to serve. We go into communities and witness firsthand the devastation of poverty and hunger. We look into the faces of starving and unclothed children. We feel the hopelessness and the desperation of the mothers and fathers who are unable to provide for their children. We hold the hand of the elderly person who is too feeble and fragile to hold the bag of lugaw we are offering. We smell the stench of homelessness and fight the urge to vomit. We stand in the middle of such need and ask God, "How can you allow this to happen?" His reply is, "how can YOU allow this to happen?" It is at this moment that I stop the questioning and start saying a prayer of thanksgiving that God has given me this opportunity to share HIS love and greatness with His children.
Can the work be overwhelming, most definitely! But I remind myself to look at how God has already equipped me to do the work He has called me to do. Doug and I have been blessed with a wonderful team of young people from the Downtown church who have a passion and desire to serve others. He has given us beautiful and loving partners such as the Cebu Missionary Foundation, Mark and Debbie Van Dyke, the Downtown Church and Richard and Becky Emperado. Lilia's Place has a wonderful and supportive team at Sugar Grove that prays daily for our needs and is always ready to share the news of Lilia's Place with others.
When I stop, think and pray, I know God is going to provide Lilia's Place with what it needs to continue the work and to meet the growing demands of those in need. I just have to remind myself to be tough, flexible and optimistic. God is in control and there is no greater pilot!
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